Consent Policy

Consent is a central part of the BDSM / kink community. We are committed to providing a safe, consent-positive space for all members of The Red Chair. This policy is meant to protect that commitment.

What is Consent?

Consent is a clear agreement between all parties to participate in a given activity. It must be freely given, informed, ongoing, and specific!

All members of TRC are expected to respect everyone's consent regardless of age, ethnicity, gender, orientation, kinks, roles, or relationships. Violations of this policy could result in a friendly warning, a temporary suspension, or even a permanent ban from TRC events.

The best rule to remember is: Ask first! If you don't have explicit consent to do something, don't do it.

Remember, anyone can withdraw consent at any time. If you want to withdraw consent, say so! As soon as anyone withdraws consent for something, it should stop immediately. At the TRC playspace, the simplest way is to use the house safeword: "Red!" If someone says, "Red!" during a scene, a dungeon monitor will check in to make sure everything is okay.


Violations of this policy could include:

* Harassment or unwanted sexual advances

* Touching someone or their property without permission

* Violation of personal space or boundaries

* Unnegotiated play

* Ignoring a safeword or stated hard limit

* Nonconsensual physical assault or abuse


Offensive remarks, “creepy” interactions, etc of other members should be directed to leadership@theredchair.org for actions to be taken, and not reported on the consent report unless consent is violated. The consent form is not the place to bring general complains about TRC, TRC members, or TRC leadership unless the complaint specifically includes a consent violation.


Before filling out the consent form, please note:

  1. Consent violations do not have to happen on at TRC private space or at a TRC event to be reported. This policy was created for the membership to be protected, even if the consent violation/incident doesn’t happen on TRC physical space.

  2. This means that it is appropriate to use this consent reporting tool to report a consent violation that involves a TRC member in any way.

  3. A consent report should not be used by nonmembers about nonmembers (unless there are very special circumstances, email consent@theredchair.org if you feel you may be an exception or have questions.

  4. If you have a concern about an individual becoming a member because of a behaviors/questionable interactions, it would be best to provide that information to leadership@theredchair.org so they know about a potential issue that may prevent this person from being suitable to join our club via vetting or as a guest for safety reasons. They will get the consent team involved if the reason is a consent violation and we will discuss any further needs with you and how to proceed.

  5. The consent team and the leadership team are volunteers with real world responsibilities. We love our club very much and want to put in the work to try and make it a safer place but we’re not perfect. We must work together to look out for each other’s safety, to speak up and speak against any behavior that could harm someone. The consent team is here to help but you have to help us and each other by letting us or leadership know when there is a problem. We are working the best we can to stay on top of things.


To report a consent violation:

  1. Fill out our online Consent Incident Report Form using the buttons below. Only report what happened to you personally, please. If something happened to a friend, have them fill out the form.

  2. If you need to talk to someone right away, you can speak with any TRC officer or director. At a party, you can speak with the MOD. They are listed on the whiteboard by the front office, or you can ask the front desk staff. Afterward, please fill out the report form anyway!

  3. A member of the consent team will contact you for more information. TRC leadership does not receive these forms, meaning members of leadership can be mentioned or reported against without fear of penalty or breach of trust.

How we respond to a consent violation report is at the discretion of the consent team. It will depend on what happened, and the wishes of the people involved. No one is exempt from this policy - not even our officers or directors. We all need to respect consent, and we hold our leaders accountable for that.

Stay safe, have fun, and if you have questions, just ask!